When the cry finally came, Kia’s heart lurched to a halt. The push to her back was the only thing that galvanized her into motion. She ran like the rest of the women, because it was expected of her. Her snow boots crunched as white puffs created by her warm breath escaped her mouth, and hung in front of her like the luminous bodies of people long past into the after life. The gasp that escaped her throat was from anxiety not weariness. Kia glanced to her left and then her right as twenty or so other women, varying in age, ran towards the icy, cold water. She could have, no doubt, beaten all of them if she had chosen to but Kia was in no hurry to reach the men. Her adopted father, White Cloud, had already told her that the hunter who made the first kill this season would be her new mate.

Kia wasn’t what the people would call beautiful. Her mother, Sunni, said that there were people who looked more like Kia than the others of the tribe. Kia wasn’t like the others. Where they were short and strong, Kia was tall and had a hard time keeping weight on her body. Although her skin was as dark as theirs, her eyes were different. Her name Kia, meaning the color of the sky in the old language, had been given to her in a fit of unoriginality. It had stuck as she grew up. Kia found out after her 8th cycle that she was not really of the people….

* * *

“Give them to me!” he ordered.

“No!” Kia pushed his hands away and stuffed the rocks into the pockets of her sealskin coat.

The boy pushed the top of her fur-clad hood back and glared into her blue eyes. “Why are you even here? You are not of the people. Look at you. You are ugly, your eyes are not like the earth and you are too tall to be of any use to a man. Now give them to me!” He reached for the rocks again.

“No, they belong to me,” Kia said firmly before she was shoved unceremoniously back and her rocks taken from her anyway.

“Pekeha,” he growled under his breath and walked away.

Kia sat for a long time pondering the hurtful things that Black Wolf had said. How could she not be of the people? She had lived with them all her life. White Cloud and Sunni were her parents. Pekehas were monsters. They weren’t real, just things your parents said to make you be quiet and go to sleep. Kia and her cousin Miko had once stayed up all night to see if they would come. A piece of walrus tusk was clutched fearfully in each of their hands as they waited for the appearance of the monstrous, smelly, white men. They never came however, and Kia and Miko felt strong for they knew now that there were no large and monstrous white men with hair of gold and red, whose horrible smell was enough to scare a bear into an early sleep. Kia shook her head. Black Wolf was crazy. She would have to ask Sunni when she returned to the tent. But first, she needed to get her rocks back. She found them two hours later, dirty and forgotten. Kia had happily washed them off, placed them in her pocket, and skipped off to find her mother.

* * *

Black Wolf’s teasing all those cycles ago still stung Kia. Because of his words, she had asked Sunni why she was indeed so different. The answer had changed Kia dramatically. The once tall and strong Kia had begun to stoop her shoulders, so as not to appear as tall. She had stopped laughing as loudly with Miko, so as not to bring attention to herself. She rarely looked anyone in the eyes for fear that they would notice that her eye color was not like the earth. But worst of all, she had realized that day that there really was such a thing as pekehas and just as the story said, they indeed stole your life away. Kia blinked back her tears as she wondered what life would be like in Black Wolf’s home. Black Wolf had been bragging recently about how he would be her mate by the end of the hunt. Kia brushed a flake of snow off of her cheek as she ran, remembering how she had simply continued serving her father and the other men sitting at the fire as they plotted strategies over the coming hunt. Whale had been spotted that morning and the potential bounty of meat and oil was enough to bring cheer to the entire village. One kill was enough to keep them all in food and oil for weeks if not a month. And to the lucky hunter who lands the fatal spear-- the bones of the whale and some of its skin went to build a new home in order to house his new mate…Kia.

The safe ice had been marked off with two-barbed whale spears which were stuck in the ground so that Kia and the rest of the women would know to wait at this point for the men to pull the small whale ashore. This would make it easier for all of winter camp to help clean and gut the animal without falling into the frigid waters. The normal excitement of the first whale kill of the season was nonexistent for Kia. She did not feel the rush of excitement that she normally felt in her daydreams. A loud yell brought her from her morose thoughts just in time to see a spear bearing Black Wolf’s colors flying towards the back of an unsuspecting hunter.

A scream caught in Kia’s throat as she watched the spear sail true to form towards the hunter’s back. He will be killed, Kia’s mind provided just as the small hunter turned around. Whether it was by skill or instinct, a glove-covered hand shot up just in time to deflect the spear. However, the hunter was so off balance from his effort and the force of the blow to his hand that he went crashing down to the ground, his head impacting with the hard ice.

Kia was the first to react. She took off running as fast as her long legs could carry her, only slowing down slightly in deference to the ice. She could hear her father and the other men berating Black Wolf for launching his spear in such a manor that could put someone in danger. None of them came over to help the small hunter still lying on his back on the ice. Kia slid to her knees and bent over the prone figure just as red lashes fluttered and then opened to reveal eyes of a startling, vibrant green.

“Kia.”

Kia was so stunned that she forgot to speak. It was the one that they called Fox. A woman. “Are you hurt?”

Fox closed her eyes and shook her head no before sitting up. Her clothes were getting wet lying on the ice and it wouldn’t do if she expected to stay to supervise the cleaning of her kill. My first whale! In her excitement, Fox almost forgot what had caused her to be lying flat on her back on the ice with Kia kneeling over her. The stinging ache in her hand left by Black Wolf’s spear caused anger to course through her body. Black Wolf had been the most vocal opponent in her participating in the whale and caribou hunt. Fox had never exchanged words with him but he made it obvious that if he were chief, she would no longer be welcome in winter camp. He had made it quite clear that it would be he who would join with Kia. None of the other men cared to quarrel with him. But Fox wasn’t anything like the other men.

The People treated Fox well enough because they were afraid of The Grandmother. And even after her death, four full cycles ago, they still treated Fox with grudging respect. As a hunter, Fox had been responsible for many fatal blows. The moose and elk hunts always ended with almost twice as many of Fox’s colored tags jutting out of the animals as anyone else. Black Wolf was the only hunter that that came anywhere close to equaling Fox’s skill, a fact that bothered him immensely; he resented the fact that a woman was a better hunter than he. Fox didn’t care; she rarely spoke to anyone other than White Cloud. Like her grandmother, she was fast becoming half myth and legend. Coming down out of the hills only to join in the great hunt and then disappearing with her share of the meat and skins. Even her dogs, bred from two white pups of her grandmother’s, seemed to inspire awe in the people.

Fox struggled to her feet. Her eyes sought and found Black Wolf who was sheepishly explaining to Kia’s father that, in his frustration, he had simply launched his spear in the air; he had had no intention of hitting Fox.

Fox rushed at him, her anger so all-consuming that she did not think of what Kia could be thinking of her display. The two hunters were on the ground before Kia’s father grabbed Fox’s arms, and she was dragged away from a smirking Black Wolf. Fox refused to break eye contact with Black Wolf as she was dragged away, the women and hunters all staring after her as if she were a mad dog. Black Wolf had tried to kill her; there was no doubt in her mind.

Once he had gotten her a safe distance from Black Wolf and the open ear of the people, White Cloud held Fox by her shoulders and shook her a little to get her attention. Fox, who was still glaring at Black Wolf, finally looked up at White Cloud, Kia’s father, her mind supplied. Fox closed her eyes in utter dread and tried to explain. “I was just so angry.”

“You must learn to listen before you react, Little Fox.” Fox looked down at her boots. She had not been called that for nearly four cycles, since The Grandmother’s death. She missed it. “You know what it means don’t you? That you have made the first kill?”

She swallowed. “Yes!”

“Very well, then you know that you have the option to join with my daughter, Kia?” All thoughts of Black Wolf flew from Fox’s mind as she looked up at White Cloud, her heart pounding and her mouth falling open slightly; their warm breath combined with the cold air, creating a dream-like quality to the moment. At least that’s how Fox would always remember it.

“Yes,” she breathed a bit shakily.

“Do you…wish to join with my daughter then?”

Fox stared at Chief White Cloud for a moment and then nodded her head vigorously. “With all that I am.”

“Very well then, it shall be so,” he said with a satisfied look on his face and he walked away, leaving her gaping after him.

Fox looked up at a sky that was nearly as white as the snow but not quite. “Thank you, Grandmother.” She walked back toward the ice, now drenched with the blood of the baby whale…remembering…

* * *

Fox walked into the small stone house and removed her snow and dirt covered boots as she always had. The dogs had been fed, but Fox had taken a bit longer than usual with them, as she had had a lot on her mind of late. “Grandmother?”

“Yes, Little Fox.” Grandmother looked up from her position, cross-legged in front of the fire. She had been trying to sew a hole in Fox’s pants for the third time in one week. She shook her head in exasperation. For the tenth time, she asked herself why she even bothered. Fox would only tear them again.

“I wish to ask you something,” Little Fox said nervously as she climbed up on her sleeping platform.

“Then ask.”

Little Fox propped her hand on her elbow and studied her grandmother for a few minutes before asking her question. “Why did you not ever join?”

“Because the one that I loved was taken from me.” Grandmother’s voice sounded very sad and Little Fox was reticent to continue.

“Why did you not join again?”

“Because there is no one that has ever won my heart again.”

“So most join for love?”

“No, most do not, Little Fox. Most join because it is a good joining, good for the family, good for everyone.”

“Thank you, Grandmother.” Little Fox lay back and stared up at the stone ceiling.

“ Little Fox, why are you asking these questions?”

“The people seem afraid of us, Grandmother.”

“That’s because they are afraid of those that are different. As I am different, so are you.” Little Fox nodded her head. Grandmother was indeed different. As Little Fox’s hair was red, hers was a yellowish color or so she had told Little Fox. Now it was a gray color not unlike the snow that they lived upon most of a full cycle. “Why do you have so many questions, Little Fox?”

“I just wondered, Grandmother.”

“No, I can see that there is more, tell me.”

Little Fox smiled across the room at her grandmother and then looked down at the handle of her knife her most prized possession. “There is someone that I think that I would like to join with.”

The grandmother stared at Little Fox for moment before she calmly went back to her sewing and pursed her lips. “Does this person wish to join with you?”

“I don’t know. No probably not. I don’t think she has noticed me.” Little Fox clamped her mouth shut as she wondered how her grandmother would react to the news that she wanted to join with a girl.

The grandmother looked up at Little Fox’s red hair, bright-green eyes, and pale skin. She shook her head. “No, I’m sure she has noticed you.”

Little Fox told how she had first noticed her, really noticed her, when they had gone to winter camp last cycle. Kia had been fishing with the rest of the women. Fox had been unable to take her eyes off of her. “I watched her from far away; she never saw me.”

“Well do you know her name?” Little Fox nodded and looked away; reticent to say the name out loud for fear that some evil spirit would do something to her love.

“Tell me about her then.” Grandmother placed the cloth aside and gave little Fox her full attention.

“She is not at all like me.”

“Well none of us are like you, my Little Fox.” Little Fox smiled at her grandmother. There were so many times in her life when she wanted to be like the people or even like her grandmother. All Little Fox had ever wanted was to blend in and not have so many dark, frightened, or curious eyes on her at every moment. Little Fox had taken to wearing her hood while anywhere near the camps. It helped keep some of the curiosity down even though her pale skin and light eyes could not be hidden.

“What I mean is, I don’t think she is of the people either at least not fully. But she has light eyes like me, but blue. And she is tall. Taller than even you are Grandmother, but her hair is dark and fine like the people. I…I think she is beautiful.”

“Ahhh,” the Grandmother nodded in approval. She should have known that it would be Kia that Fox would notice first. Kia was indeed a beautiful girl although she doubted that anyone had told her so in a long time, if ever. Although, she had no doubt that her family loved and doted on her. The things that made Little Fox, Kia and to a lesser degree she herself different, were not always appreciated by The People.

“Grandmother, how do I…I would like to join with her one day. When I have my own things,” Little Fox finished quickly and then turned away.

The grandmother tried hard not to laugh. Her Little Fox was so young and impetuous. However, when she set her mind to it, she could be as stubborn as they come. “Just like everything, you must close your eyes and wish it so, Little Fox.”

“But, Grandmother, I don’t know if Kia will wait for my wish to come true,” Little Fox said exasperatedly.

“Well then, Little Fox, you had better work fast. Kia will be of marrying age soon, and you don’t want her to marry anyone else, now do you?” The grandmother looked down to hide the teasing smile that curled her lips.

“Oh, no!” The idea caused Little Fox’s nostrils to flare. “I wish her to be my mate, no one else’s.”

“Very well then, I shall talk to her father. He is an old friend, he will listen to me.”

Little Fox traced a pattern in the fur that she sat on, deep in thought. The grandmother’s pledge to help her should have made her happy, but it didn’t. For the first time in Little Fox’s short life, she felt fear. “Grandmother?”

“Yes, Little Fox?”

“What do I do with her?”

“What do you mean, Little Fox?” The grandmother asked tiredly as she stood up slowly to climb on to her own sleeping platform. The ache in her leg was becoming worse. She was finding it hard to hide the fact that she was getting sick from Little Fox. As much as she longed to be with her lost love in the after, she worried about her Little Fox. Even though Little Fox was capable of caring for herself, she knew better than anyone how lonely it could be in the frozen tundra living just outside of the camps, accepted but not welcome. No, Little Fox needed a family and she would go out of her way to make sure that she was given a chance at love.

“I mean how do I …join with her?”

The grandmother did laugh then. She felt a sense of sadness though. She did not think she would live long enough to see Little Fox joined, but she had an idea how she could make sure that she was happy. “Well, Little Fox, that is a long lesson, one that we can start but not finish tonight. But you must promise to listen and not interrupt, do you understand?”

“Yes, Grandmother.”

Little Fox lay back in her furs and listened to her grandmother’s voice long into the night. There were so many things that she wanted to ask, so many things that she didn’t understand, but she was afraid that her grandmother would stop, so she just listened intently until she could no longer stave off sleep.

“Sleep well, Little Fox, there will be more to learn. But it will have to wait for another day.”

“Sleep well, Grandmother.”

* * *

The singing was so joyful that it hurt Kia’s ears. The whole of winter camp seemed to be celebrating her impending marriage; everyone saw it as a happy occasion. Everyone that is, except Kia and Black Wolf. Kia was afraid of Fox, always had been; her hair so fiery, red and wild and with eyes a color of green that she had never seen before. Fox was not what she thought of when she dreamed of what her mate would look like. Not withstanding the fact that she was indeed a great hunter, Fox was still a woman and not able to give her children. The one thing that Kia had always looked forward to about joining was a child. She was often a sought after care sitter when she was younger. Kia thought that perhaps this was to be her punishment for all of the horrible things she had wished upon Black Wolf.

The tent flap was drawn back so quickly that Kia jumped. Sunni walked into the tent and wrapped her in her arms.

“Are you ready, my daughter? I know you’re scared but it will be over soon.”

“But …but I cannot marry her.”

“You can and you will,” Sunni told her adopted daughter sternly. Although she too had voiced similar doubts to her mate only moments before, she could not allow Kia to see her fear. “It is White Cloud’s wish. He has promised it. It must be so.” Then Sunni used the words that her mate had used to calm her when she had hysterically requested that he not make her only daughter join with the strange Fox. “Would you have him shamed?”

“No,” Kia answered quietly. White Cloud had been a wonderful father. Kia loved him dearly and would never do anything to make him look bad in the eyes of The People.

“Fox has honored you with her kill. The meat from the one kill will feed all of winter camp for two weeks alone. The skins will make fine homes. You will not have to worry about children...”

“But I want children!” Kia cried out her heart leaping into her throat.

“Well I’m sure that is something that you will have to discuss with your… Fox.”

The flap was thrown back and Miko, Kia’s cousin, poked her round face through the door.

“It is time, cousin,” she grinned happily and Kia wanted to hurl something after her. Miko was happy that she would be marrying Fox for that would leave Black Wolf for her, as she would be the only woman of marrying age left in camp.

Kia had no aspirations to be Black Wolf’s mate, never had, but in some ways she would have rather married Black Wolf than the mysterious and terrifying Fox.

“I must leave you now, my daughter, for the ceremony begins.”

Kia watched Sunni leave, her mind already trying to work out ways to get out of the agreement without her father losing face. Perhaps Fox did not wish to marry her, in which case, it would be beneficial for both of them to help each other.

The flap flew back and amid loud whooping and horrifying screeching, Kia was picked up from the place by the fire and dragged out of her tent. The entire winter camp was standing around a large fire; all of them bundled up in their furs and all looking as though they were about to see some type of miracle. Kia tried to catch Fox’s eye but Fox had her eyes trained on White Cloud and did not look her way.

It felt like a dream to Kia. She could not believe that in moments, she would be joined with someone who she had only just seen a few times during the hunts. The words that White Cloud spoke meant nothing to Kia and within moments, the brown leather tie was wrapped around Fox and Kia’s hands. Kia stared at them briefly, her mind in turmoil; her hand was larger than Fox’s, startling her to the point that she almost took a step back. The loud whooping began again and she and Fox were pushed into the joining tent and left alone.

* * *

Kia stared at Fox with naked fear in her eyes.

Fox stepped forward; I will introduce myself as my grandmother taught me, she thought as she reached her hand out to touch Kia’s, but Kia only stepped back warily.

“I do not wish this,” was blurted from her mouth before she could stop herself. A half formed sob pushed past her lips and hung in the tent like an evil spirit waiting to claim a new soul.

Fox froze, the formal introduction forgotten as the cold truth slapped her in the face.

“You do not wish this?” she repeated half-wittedly because she did not know what else to say.

“I do not,” Kia sobbed miserably as she stared at the sparkling, green eyes and thick, red hair.

“Why did you not speak before? Why did you let us join?” Fox felt herself get angry as she spoke but tried to calm herself for fear that Kia would cry more.

“I….” Kia’s response was drowned out by music. The drumbeats and loud singing were to signify that the joining ceremony was underway. It was to last until the elders felt that the union had been completed. The singing and drums were a ceremonial effort to give the newly joined privacy.

“You would disgrace your family by refusing me?” Fox asked angrily.

“No… I?”

“Then what will you do when the mother checks you and you have not been tried?”

“I don’t know.”

Fox turned away from Kia disappointed and angry. Her grandmother’s words were coming to her as clearly as if she were speaking to her now. You must make sure she is not afraid; otherwise, she will not enjoy what you offer.

Fox racked her brain and nervously pushed her red hair back out of her face. The sting from the wound inflicted by Black Wolf’s spear was what gave her the idea first. She whipped around and glared at Kia for a moment before easing her gaze lest she frighten her. Be easy, Fox, yours is not the way of the female but you must learn to be easy so as not to frighten her.

“I have an idea but it will only work if you help me.”

Kia looked at Fox suspiciously for a moment then nodded her head in agreement.

“The mother will check to make sure that our union is complete.” A sense of dread washed over Kia. Of course she would check; they always checked. It was the only way to make certain that a man did not claim later that another man had tried his mate and return her to her family. The only time that they didn’t check was in the case of a joining in which the woman’s mate had been killed. In which case, the second mate was to be honored if the first died a good death. All honor and material items that are owned by the first would be bestowed on the second after the union.

“Yes, they always check. It is custom,” Kia answered despondently.

“Then we must make it look like we have.”

“How will we do that?” Kia asked fearfully.

“Remove your clothes and lay down.”

Kia shook her head vigorously. “No, I will not.”

“We don’t have much time, Kia. The mother will be here soon and she will check you, and if she thinks that you have not been tried, then you will be disgraced and so will I.”

Kia considered Fox’s words carefully. Fox was right. Just as there was a stigma attached to women who were tried before joining, there was also one on men who could not perform their duties.

“But… but you are a woman as I am, perhaps they will not check.”

“They will check,” she said confidently. “You will have to disrobe. We don’t have much time unless you want to tell them that you have been tried before the joining?”

Kia bit her lip. To admit to being tried while not joined, was a fate worse than death to most girls. No man would ever marry you, as you would be likely to allow anyone to try you. The best option that you would have would be to hope for a servitude position or leave the people, which meant almost certain death.

“I don’t think they would believe that I could not perform, so that won’t work…”

Kia wanted badly to ask why but she didn’t. It didn’t matter. So she started to undress. First, went her coat and deerskin shirt with the colored beads around the neck. Then, her boots and last her breeches. The whole time, she forbade herself to look at Fox. Finally, she lay down and pulled the joining furs up to her shoulders. They were of the finest quality and if Kia hadn’t been so direly afraid, she may have been able to enjoy their softness. As it was, she had started to tremble.

“Are you cold?” The question was asked, it seemed, from right above her.

Kia gasped as she stared up at the nude Fox. Her eyes turned away as she was treated to a close up view of her entire body. She turned away as if she had been scalded.

Fox began to get angry. Her grandmother had told her to be kind, she had been nothing but. She was going to make it so that she could win Kia over, something that none of the other women of the people had benefit of. But she was beginning to think that Kia would never have her as her mate and Fox knew she could not allow that to happen. Fox sighed and picked up the long bearskin coat. Her fingers caressed the white coat admiringly. The bear was a symbol of longevity and good for a hunter. It was the most dangerous of foes. Every man of The People who had a girl child, at some point before she is of joining age, must hunt and kill the white bear. Before his daughter is joined, the father bestows on the man a coat, as was bestowed upon him by his father. The belief was that the strength of the bear would mingle with his soul and help to impregnate the woman. Fox had been given the coat by White Cloud. She had ignored the laughing that had broken out among the men when he had handed her the gift. None of it mattered; she had listened to her grandmother, she had been patient and had wished it so. Finally, Kia was hers. Fox slipped her arms into the coat and took a deep breath.

“Kia look at me?”

Kia fearfully did and Fox had to swallow before she finished what she was going to say. It would be hard, but she would let Kia make her own way and hope that she learned to love Fox as much as Fox loved her.

Fox reached down beside Kia causing her to jump fearfully. “Do you see?” She opened her hand slowly and showed Kia what she held.

“I am not hungry,” Kia said softly causing Fox to chuckle briefly.

“No, I don’t suppose you are.” She looked down at the blossom berries in her hand and then back at Kia. “We use these to paint our face during the whale hunt, do you know why?”

“Because it symbolizes the blood of the whale to thank him for the food and shelter that he will give us.”

“That is correct,” Fox nodded in an unconscious mimic of her grandmother.

Kia stared at the berries for a moment and watched as Fox’s hand closed around them and a red, blood-like substance seeped through her fingers. Fox caught the droplets that would have landed on the fur-covered floor of the tent with her other hand.

“Lay back now, Kia, we don’t have much time.” The singing was periodically getting louder. Fox tried not to think of the fact that she was not bringing her mate to orgasm as was assumed by the loud singing. She wanted to shout that there was no need for their singing as there would be nothing to overhear. She knew that they were all out there drinking, eating and smoking and telling lewd jokes about what was going on in the tent at that very moment.

“Fox, please… I’m afraid... I don’t want this.”

“Kia, I’m not going to hurt you,” Fox explained exasperatedly. “I’m going to put this on you. When the mother comes in, if she doesn’t look too closely, she will think that you have been taken.”

Kia sucked in a harsh breath and stared at Fox disbelievingly. “And what of you? Will they not check you?”

For some reason the question made Fox’s heart hurt but she shook her head. “No. I am a hunter, they will not check me.”

Kia lay back and pulled the warm skins over her shoulders.

“Kia, you must pull the blankets down. I don’t want to get the juice on the furs.”

Kia slowly pulled the blankets down over her shoulders; the chill in the room did not cause her to tremble as much as her fear. She looked up at the feverish green of Fox’s eyes and slammed her own eyes shut. She paused just before she revealed her breasts to those feverish animal eyes and nearly jumped off the furs as Fox rasped hotly. “You must hurry, Kia, they will be here any minute.”

Kia nodded and pushed the skins down her body until they rested at her knees.

“Remove them, Kia,” Fox said softly, even as her eyes rested for the first time on Kia. She had to remind herself to breathe. Her grandmother was right, Kia was beautiful and she would be worth the wait. Fox ignored the tightening in her stomach and the warmth between her legs as she moved closer. “Open your legs,” she whispered softly.

The singing had all but stopped; this was the time in which “The Mother” was picked. “The Mother” was not necessarily the mother of either of the joined couple. It was an honored position that was elected each joining celebration. There was no doubt in Fox’s mind however, that Kia’s mother would be “The Mother” as she had been picked more than any other woman of age in the village. She hoped the fact that it was her own daughter would insure that she would not check too thoroughly.

Kia began to sob softly as she opened her legs with dread. Fox felt bad that she was scaring Kia but it had to be done and Kia would perhaps appreciate how gently she was handling the situation later.

Fox gently pushed Kia’s legs open further and had to blink twice to clear her vision as she received her first view of Kia’s womanhood. Like a fine, silky pelt, it beckoned to Fox to touch it, to explore its softness. So different from Fox’s own that Fox suddenly felt a shame that she had not felt since she first noticed that her own womanhood was covered with curly red hairs and not black, as was the other women of The People. Fox shook herself and crawled between Kia’s opened legs and leaned forward so that she could see what she was doing in the dim firelight.

She painted the berry juice on Kia’s thighs with shaking fingers, her eyes still riveted on Kia’s sex, when a whimper caused her to look up quickly to see that Kia had placed both hands over her eyes and was now crying softly. Fox wanted so badly to apologize for scaring her but it was the only way. She was sure that Kia would be thankful later. The singing abruptly stopped signifying that “The Mother” had been picked and would come into the tent at any moment. Fox swallowed and finished painting Kia’s thighs and then whispered Kia’s name.

“Kia, I am going to touch you now. I wont hurt you, I’m just going to put some of the berries on you, don’t cry out.” Kia nodded even though she continued to sob silently. They both jumped at the first touch of Fox’s hands on Kia’s womanhood. Fox briefly thought she should have Kia do this but she didn’t have time to explain it to her so she gently parted the lips of Kia’s sex and with fingertips still shaking from nervousness, she gently rubbed the berry juice over Kia. Kia had started to tremble as well, her face covered with tears, her eyes shut as if she was in agony, making Fox’s heart hurt for her. The shout from outside caused Kia’s eyes to open wide. She had been to enough joining ceremonies to know that “The Mother” would be there any minute. She looked pleadingly at Fox

“You have to clean your hands there’s too much…” she whispered desperately through her tears.

Fox looked around frantically for somewhere to hide the mashed berries in her hand. She looked down at Kia fearfully, she had not thought of this. They had to dispose of what was left of the now crushed berries or someone might figure it out. Almost as soon as the idea dawned on Fox, she had shoved most of the contents into her mouth at the same time covering Kia’s body with her own. Kia was so surprised by the sudden movement that a little cry escaped her mouth before Fox silenced her with a glare.

“Help me, Kia.” Fox shoved the rest of the berries into Kia’s opened mouth while squirming her hips in between Kia’s legs. Heart pounding, she covered Kia’s mouth with her own and kissed her for the first time. A small groan escaped her throat as the taste of the berries and Kia’s lips infiltrated her chaotic thoughts. Fox thought it was her imagination that made her believe that she tasted the faint muskiness of Kia’s sex. She moved her lips over Kia’s again in the hope that the faintly musky flavor would return. She was almost instantly lost in the kiss.

Kia’s breathing was shallow and frightened. The initial shock of having someone’s nude body on top of her own faded and Kia became acutely aware of the silken wetness that was between she and Fox. Fox moved her hips imperceptibly at first and then with slightly more force as a soft moan escaped from Kia’s lips. Warmth settled in the bottom of her stomach as Fox’s tongue gently began to request entrance into her mouth. She had expected everything but this sweet, warm kiss that made her feel as if she wanted to move closer to Fox.

A chuckle was heard from behind causing Fox to reach for her knife and turn in one swoop. “The Mother” wore a ceremonial mask, as does the chief during a joining. However, Fox could tell from the body that it was indeed Kia’s mother who would be checking her.

Nodding to “The Mother” by way of apology, Fox set her knife down and carefully removed herself from between Kia’s legs noting with some approval that the juice did indeed look like blood and had even gotten some on herself. While “The Mother” leaned over Kia, Fox carefully wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Her eyes going to Kia’s mouth she was relieved to see none of the remnants of the berries. And Kia had at least stopped sobbing although her face was still completely wet.

The mother looked at her womanhood by gently moving Kia’s legs apart and peering at her sex through the mask. Kia once again turned her head away in embarrassment. It seemed like a season had passed to Fox before “The Mother” quietly stood and gave one nod of approval to Fox and left the tent. The joyous cry from outside of the tent is what told Fox that she had succeeded in her deceit. As the drums started to pound with full force, Fox dropped weakly to the floor. She had done it. Kia was hers and no one could take her away. She looked over at Kia, her dark silky hair blending almost perfectly with the furs as she began to sob again quietly. She turned her back to Fox and curled into a ball to comfort herself. The joy that Fox felt at finally joining with Kia began to wane as she looked at her mate’s back shake from the strength of her sobs.

* * *

The celebration went on throughout the night and well into the morning. Kia knew because she had lain awake for most of it. It seemed unreal that there were people celebrating her joining and yet she herself could find no reason to rejoice.

She had been unable to think of anything to say to Fox as she watched her red haired mate pack her belongings onto her sleigh. Fox’s white dogs whined and tested the leather belts that harnessed them as if they sensed the nervousness in the air. She could not even bring herself to thank her properly for not insisting upon a proper joining, as was her right and now she was expected to say goodbye to her family and go off with Fox to parts unknown. For no one really knew where Fox lived. She had always just come into the camp with her grandmother and then later by herself to trade and take part in the runs. Kia could still hear some of the men protesting early on about allowing Fox to take part in the caribou runs. However, White Cloud had put a stop to that instantly by pointing out that neither Fox nor her grandmother had a man to hunt for them, so it stood to reason that Fox would hunt or starve. There had been some grumbling, but Fox had not been stopped from joining the hunt and soon she was the most successful hunter of them all and no other protests were waged against her joining the run.

“Are you ready?” Fox asked quietly, startling Kia who had been staring off at the black ice capped mountains.

“Yes,” she said shortly. She felt slightly ashamed that she hadn’t spoken but a few words to Fox since waking that morning but she truly did not know what to say. It had all happened so fast that she had been unable to think let alone speak.

Kia turned to her mother and hugged her fiercely to her chest. This would no longer be her home. And in less than a quarter cycles time, her family and all of The People would move away from winter camp and follow the caribou. Fox and her grandmother had never moved with them. Kia was sure that Fox would not change because she was now joined.

Kia often wished that she could stay and not have to pick up roots with every change of the seasons. Now she regretted that wish; she wanted nothing more than to leave with her family this time.

Kia sat down on the sled, her meager belongings tied onto the front along with the joining coat and other gifts that had been bestowed on Fox by White Cloud. Kia looked back at Fox but found her expression unreadable. Before she could lift her hand to wave at her mother one last time, Fox took off, causing Kia to have to grab hold of her waist or be thrown off the back.

Unbeknownst to Kia, Fox was lost in her own dark thoughts. As she had come out of the joining tent, Black Wolf had cornered her.

“So, you think you are a man do you?”

“I am no man.”

“That’s right and you are no hunter.”

Fox grinned. “I am a better hunter than you will ever be,” she said cockily, her eyes daring Black Wolf to challenge her.

Black Wolf snarled at her and then an evil gleam reached his eyes. “You think you have won but you have not. What will you do when you cannot give her children?”

“We are both foundlings, we will become caregivers!” Fox said it with a little more conviction than she had felt. It never occurred to her that Kia might want children. In fact a lot of things had never occurred to her, for example, that Kia may never learn to feel for Fox the way she wanted her to.

Fox was so stunned by the thought that she turned away from Black Wolf without so much as a look in his direction. Black Wolf, believing he had struck a blow, went in for the kill like a true hunter, yelling after her, “don’t worry. When you can’t pleasure her, she will come running back to me!”

Fox’s mouth tightened as Black Wolf’s words came flowing back to her with the clarity that only hurtful words have. She was so enrapt with her thoughts that she didn’t notice the small team of four dogs and sled that followed discreetly behind her.

* * *

Fox loosened her hands and allowed her dogs to run to their shelter of their own accord. Her sharp eyes taking in the area surrounding her home and finding nothing amiss, she concentrated on unloading Kia’s meager belongings from the front of the sled. Fox led the way as Kia followed her into the stone house.

The People lived in tents made of hides from the caribou. Snow was packed on the side to keep cold air from blowing the tents away. As long as Fox could remember, she had always lived in this stone house with her grandmother. It was the one reason that they did not have to move as The People did.

Kia cleared her throat after several minutes had passed with no conversation. “Where shall I sleep?” she asked nervously as she looked around at the sod-covered walls. The only thing familiar about the dwelling was that like her tent in winter camp, the floors were covered with soft furs.

Fox held several blankets in her arms while she looked up blankly at Kia. She could tell by the nervous expression on Kia’s face that Kia did not wish to sleep with her so she simply turned and said, “I will show you.” Fox tried hard not to let disappointment seep into her voice but was sure she failed miserably.

“There.” She pointed at the sleeping platform that was now hers and had formerly belonged to her grandmother. It was twice the size of the one that was across the room. Both were on either side of the fire for warmth.

Kia nodded in satisfaction and began to look around the room in amazement. She had heard of such dwellings before but had never seen one. Her people never built permanent dwellings. Theirs was a sedentary lifestyle. They lived and ate based on the tide of the caribou, rarely staying more than one-quarter cycle in any one place “This…this will not fall down when the snow comes?”

“No, it is strong. I have lived here all of my life.”

“Who built this place?” Kia asked, her natural curiosity allowing her to temporarily forget her troubles. Fox was kneeling by the fire circle knocking together two pieces of new flint that she had gotten from White Cloud so it was a moment before she spoke.

“My grandmother and her mate.”

“Her mate?” Kia was surprised. For as long as she had known of The Grandmother, it had only been she and Fox never anyone else; nor had she heard tell of any mate when the men talked about them around the fires.

“What happened to him?”

“Her.”

“Her?”

“Yes, I think it was a her.”

“You don’t know?”

“No, I don’t. Grandmother didn’t talk of her. And I do not know what happened to her.”

Kia watched as Fox quickly stripped some of her clothes as the room around them heated up. She walked over to a shelf and gathered a few spices. “I am going to go check my traps. No one ever comes here, you should be safe.”

Kia nodded, grateful for some time alone to look around the strange place that was to be her new home. Fox left quietly and Kia let out a sigh of relief, the tension that she felt in Fox’s presence fading as she took in her surroundings without those penetrating green eyes watching her every move.

She sat down on the stone sleeping platform and looked around. Aside from the cheery fire burning in the center circle, there were no decorations. No colorful skins, blankets or pottery, nothing that even spoke of the person that lived there. Along one wall was a shelf chipped from the same type of stone that the house was made of with numerous jars filled with what looked like spices in each. Directly across from where Kia sat was a small sleeping platform that she had assumed would be Fox’s. In one corner there was a small doll carved out of what looked to be walrus tusk. Kia picked it up and studied it, a small smile on her face. She had seen such dolls in her own village but it surprised her to see one in Fox’s possession. Kia turned the doll over carefully and her smile faltered as she noticed that someone had taken the time to give it red hair like Fox’s. Probably using the same berries that Fox had smeared on her body to simulate the same color. Kia was glad that someone cared about Fox enough to make her such a thing. She herself always had dolls similar to those of the other children. None of the adults had ever bothered to make them have eyes or a face like hers. Kia replaced the doll and prepared to continue her inspection.

The clanging of something metallic caught Kia’s ear. She listened for it again and sure enough it was repeated again, this time closer than before. Kia moved towards the doorway, and cautiously moved aside the heavy skin that hung there as she peered out. The sled and team of dogs were familiar but obviously not Fox’s distinctive all white furred and blue eyed dogs. Kia felt a steady apprehension as the team came closer. Fox had said that no one but White Cloud had known where she lived, yet here was a stranger approaching and from the trajectory of the dogs, they were purposely heading towards Fox’s house. Kia vaguely wondered if she should hide. She had heard horrible stories about what the Pekehas did to women of The People if they found them alone. Kia herself had never seen one and she hoped she never did. A harsh barking command told Kia instantly who was approaching and though her body did relax slightly, a worried frown creased her face.

Why would Black Wolf come here? He and Fox had done nothing but stare angrily at each other every time they came into contact with each other, after the incident during the whale hunt.

Black Wolf pulled his dogs right in front of the house, not bothering to shelter them. He stepped off the rungs of his sled and walked towards the house, a determined look already on his face. Kia waited for Black Wolf to come closer before she asked worriedly. “Is there something wrong, Black Wolf? Why are you here?”

Black Wolf stopped in front of Kia and said politely, “I wish to speak with you, Kia.”

Kia nodded and stepped away from the door. Black Wolf walked into the stone home looking around as if he expected the roof to cave in just as Kia had.

“Why are you here, Black Wolf? If Fox finds you here, she will not be so welcoming.’

Black Wolf turned angrily towards Kia, momentarily forgetting his amazement at the stone house. He, like Kia, had never seen a permanent home. All of The People and even the other tribes that they came in contact with lived in tents or icehouses that were built almost entirely of snow. Whole settlements could be picked up and moved in a matter of days. It was their way. This dwelling and its two smaller dwellings were built to withstand the heavy snow of winter as well as to keep cool in the summer. He had always wondered how Fox and her grandmother survived in one place.

“I don’t care if she is not welcoming, I came here to speak to you!” Black Wolf growled angrily before he was able to stop himself. He softened his tone and continued. “I did not come here to talk to that…to Fox. I came here to talk to you.”

“To me? Why?” Kia frowned again. She and Black Wolf had rarely spoken; not even in greeting. He had teased her mercilessly when they were children but other than that, there had been no offers of friendship on either of their parts.

“Kia, I have come to take you back to winter camp.”

“Is there something wrong with mother,” Kia asked, as she looked around frantically for her coat.

“No, she is well, everyone is well.”

Kia stopped and looked questioningly at Black Wolf. “Then why are you here? Why would I go back?”

“I am here because you do not belong with that …with that…pekeha. I am who you are to join with. This,” he waved his had disdainfully, “is not where you belong, you belong with The People as the mother of my children.” Black Wolf stood tall as he said it. There was no doubt in his mind that Kia would thank him for rescuing her.

Kia’s mouth hung open at Black Wolf’s words. “Black Wolf, I am joined. What you are suggesting would cause father to ban both of us from The People. I am joined with Fox,” Kia stated, amazed that Black Wolf would dare to test the law.

“You cannot be joined with her. She is a woman. How can she give you what I can?”

“She cannot,” Kia answered truthfully. As she watched Black Wolf walk around Fox’s home with disdain, she wondered if she had ever really wanted what he had to offer. She was about to say, ‘nor does she wish to’, when Black Wolf interrupted her.

“Then you agree with me!” Black Wolf said satisfactorily, a triumphant grin already on his face. “Get your things, we will go see your father. We will explain to him that this is not as it should be. You cannot stay with someone who does not give you pleasure or children. She cannot give you either.” He turned his back to Kia and walked over to the smaller sleeping platform and picked up the little doll that Fox’s grandmother had made for her and with a disdainful laugh he tossed it back on the stone not bothering to put it back as he had found it. Black Wolf had already begun to think of what he would say to Kia’s fool of a father. He was certain he could convince him to see things his way. Black Wolf did not even bother to look back at Kia. He was so sure that she would simply follow his order.

“Black Wolf?” Kia said her voice sounding small to her own ears. Black Wolf turned around and noting that Kia had not moved, he began to frown. She would have to be taught that when he told her to do something, he expected it done quickly. He would have time to do that after their joining.

“I want you to leave my home.”

Black Wolf stiffened, his skin darkened angrily as Kia’s words sank in. “Your home? This is not your home, this is that …that white demon’s home.”

Kia felt anger well up in her chest as she stared hard at Black Wolf. Even though she feared Fox, she new how hurtful Black Wolf’s words could be and she did not wish Fox to feel as she had all those cycles ago. “She is not a demon! She is as I am and she is my mate. You are no longer welcome here. Please leave.”

“Kia…” Black Wolf paled at the determined look on Kia’s face. His face then flushed as he realized that he had lost her.

In truth, he had never had her but this gave him all the more reason to hate the one they called Fox. “Kia, come with me.” Black Wolf angrily reached out to grab Kia’s arm. Kia pulled away roughly causing Black Wolf to stare at her incredulously.

Kia stood tall in front of him. In her anger, she did not bother to slump her shoulders; her mouth tightened. “Please leave and do not return. I have made my wishes clear. I am joined.”

“If you do not come with me now, then I will take Miko as my mate. You will be forced to stay here with that pekeha.”

Kia wanted so badly to tell Black Wolf that she would rather stay here with Fox than mate with him but she said nothing, just walked to the door and pulled the skin back, her eyes telling him what her mouth did not.

Black Wolf walked to the door without looking at Kia. Stunned by his own failure to win Kia from a woman, he said, “I will marry Miko tonight. If you come to me before then, I will join with you instead.” He walked through the door never dreaming of the level of hatred and disgust his last few words had left in Kia. There was a time when she had accepted that she would join with Black Wolf one day. Now she realized that to join with him would have been the worst mistake she could have made. Kia let the heavy skin drop into place in front of the door and turned towards the fire. She had Fox to thank for saving her from that mistake.

* * *

A snowflake sailed from the sky and landed gently on the end of light-colored lashes. Changing rapidly from solid to liquid, it moved in the form of one solitary drop of water down the lash and into an open eye. Fox didn’t blink; she stood frozen as she watched Black Wolf’s sled disappear over the hill and from her view. Fox pushed her hood from her head as if it would help her to see him better. Her eyes unblinkingly focused on the place where she had seen him last. Anger as bright as the hair that now billowed around her pale face curled its way through her body until its white-hot grip settled contentedly on her heart. She thought about going after him but she would have a hard time catching him before he reached winter camp. Nolo, Fox’s lead dog looked back at the stiff woman behind him and whined quietly for his orders. Fox looked down at him silently and with a soft whistle, they began to move slowly towards home. Fox was slower than usual while she unharnessed the dogs. She could not remember ever being this angry. Even when Black Wolf had thrown the spear at her, she had not felt as angry as she did now.

Kia carefully put the small doll back in its place in the corner of the platform and started exploring the rest of the dwelling. It was natural for her to start to clean and lay out her sleeping furs and she was happily singing to herself when she finally heard the crunch of Fox’s snow shoes as she approached the door. Fox walked into her home and had to blink twice before she realized that she had indeed walked into the right place.

“You’ve made yourself at home, good,” Fox said tightly as she noticed that Kia seemed happy and no longer walked with her shoulders stooped as she did on many other occasions that Fox observed her.

“I thought if I put my things up, I wouldn’t miss home so much.”

Fox nodded and sat down on the small stone across from the fire and began to pull off her boots. Kia watched mesmerized, before lurching forward to help.

“Let me help you.” She grabbed Fox’s boot and began to pull.

Fox jumped and pushed her hands away as if she had done something wrong. “I can remove my own boots,” she growled.

Kia jumped back as if Fox had struck her and backed away confused. Her mother had always helped her father remove his boots when he came home. It was custom.

Fox removed her boots and looked down at the cloth that both kept her foot warm and kept her boots from chafing when she walked. “I am not a man. I do not wish to be treated as such.” Fox stood up and began preparing the meat for the fire. Kia watched in shock as Fox expertly prepared the meal.

Finally, Fox looked up at the quietly watching Kia. “Are you hungry?”

“Yes.” Kia had decided that she would only speak when spoken to and just do as she was told until she could better understand this strange person. They sat that way for long moments, neither willing to speak. Kia content in her new found freedom and Fox simmering like the rabbit that cooked in the fire. In her anger, she began to believe that Kia had let Black Wolf join with her. She hadn’t thought that Kia would do such a thing. That’s why she had been willing to wait to join with her, content with the fact that their union had already been blessed.

Fox walked over to a shelf and removed a knife and two stone bowls. She cut two large pieces of meat from the rabbit roasting in the fire and handed the larger of the two to Kia. They both ate quietly but ravenously.

“I did not mean to be so harsh with you,” Fox said after a few bites.

Kia tore her eyes from the succulent meat and met the steady green-eyed gaze of Fox. “I understand.” She really did not understand. Fox had been sharp with her for doing something that was her duty. What other things was she going to be reprimanded for?

Fox nodded and concentrated on her bowl again. She took two more bites before her chewing slowed and she stared blindly down at the bowl. She wondered if Kia would tell her of Black Wolf’s visit. She didn’t know how to approach the subject so she simply stewed in her own anger.

Kia watched quietly as Fox pulled several traps from her bag made of caribou hide and began to check them gravely. For hours, Kia watched as Fox worked on the traps until they were all cleaned. She carefully placed them back into the bag. Kia thought briefly about telling Fox of Black Wolf’s visit but decided that it would be of no good to anyone.

When Fox realized that Kia was not going to tell her of Black Wolf’s visit, her deepest fears were confirmed. “It is time to sleep,” she said so abruptly that Kia jumped, nearly dropping the skin she had been sewing. She quickly stood up and disrobed, careful not to look at Fox as she did so. Kia quickly lay down and turned her face to the wall as Fox began to disrobe.

Pulling back the furs that had been rolled and placed neatly under the sleeping platform, Fox’s anger was appeased slightly when she noted that Kia had laid soft grasses underneath so that it would not be so hard when she lay down.

Fox lay down and tried to shut her eyes tightly against the thoughts that refused to let her sleep. The memories of Black Wolf hurriedly leaving her home made Fox’s flesh crawl in anger. The memories of Kia’s skin beneath her and the taste of berries on her lips caused Fox to grip angrily at her sleeping furs. Finally, like the dagger to her heart that they were meant to be, Black Wolf’s words tore through Fox’s heart and caused her to sit up in bed gasping for breath. She looked across the fire at the place where Kia lay.

She would not allow this to go on. Kia was her mate; it was their duty to comfort each other. Fox walked over to the sleeping platform that Kia lay huddled on and reached to pull the furs back. She would just sleep next to her. She would wait until the sun rose to discuss Black Wolf.

“What are you doing?” Kia asked loudly as she sat up. Fox immediately began to burn with anger and shame. How dare she. She should not be made to feel like a stranger in her own home.

“You are my mate.”

“I know.”

“Then you must lay with me.”

“I know what my duties are but…” Kia was confused. She had been resigned that she would have to do her duties but when Fox had not insisted, she had assumed that she would be allowed to take her time getting used to the idea. Stomach quivering, she watched as Fox walked away.

Fox looked around blindly for their joining coat, she spotted the white fur stuffed under her sleeping platform as if it where of no importance. For some reason, this too served to keep her anger burning brightly. She pulled the coat out and put it on before returning to the larger sleeping platform where Kia sat fearfully watching. Her furs held tightly to her chest as if for protection.

“Will you deny me, Kia?”

Kia swallowed hard. Could she deny Fox? To do so would no doubt result in her being sent back to winter camp. Most assuredly it would mean shame to White Cloud and Sunni. No matter how scared Kia was, she was not prepared to do that.

“No, I do not …deny you, Fox,” she said so softly that she was afraid she would have to repeat herself to be heard.

“Then lay back,” Fox said, her voice deep and strained.

Kia did as she was told. Fox opened her coat so that Kia was able to see everything including the red hair that lay smoothly against her sex.

Kia remembered the words that Sunni had told her. A woman must submit to her mate’s needs. It is her duty, but it does not mean she has to like them. It is not good to be seen as a willing partner the first time; otherwise, your mate might see you as an easy women. Kia was afraid; she didn’t know why Fox was suddenly so angry with her but worst of all she didn’t know what was expected. Kia gripped the furs under her body and turned her face away from Fox. Sunni had told her so many things. But Fox was different, she was not a man.

Kia jumped when she felt warm hands touch her shoulder. Her first thought was to push the hands away but she stilled herself.

“Kia, don’t be afraid.” Fox’s voice sounded nervous as she called out her name but Kia refused to look at her.

Fox had wanted to tell her what she was feeling. She regretted being so harsh but now she felt anger burn in her chest causing her to blink her eyes several times. She knew that Kia had not wished her attention, had even begged her father not to make her marry Fox. Fox had acted as if she were just following through with custom, but she wanted Kia with a passion that she did not have words for. Even though she had only seen her a few times, she had thought of her almost every night before she went to sleep.

Fox lay down on top of Kia, her body trembling as she made contact with Kia in every way possible. Black Wolf’s words burning into her mind, “don’t worry. When you can’t pleasure her, she will come running back to me.”

“Kia, will you look at me please?” But Kia would not look at Fox for fear that she would burst into tears. Her body trembled in fright and nervousness as the smaller body covered hers, touching her in places that only joined people had a right to touch.

I will pleasure you, Kia. I will give you no reason to leave me, Fox thought as she stared down at the dark hair of her mate. I will tell her that I love her now and then she will understand.

The coat covered them both fully, she shouldn’t have been cold but she was. “Kia, look at me please.”

“No, I can’t.” Kia felt confusion burning through her. Surely she was missing something some bit of information to explain why she felt so many emotions that where at odds with each other.

“Please, Kia.”

Kia only shook her head, refusing to even voice an answer. Fox felt as though she had just fallen into the water during a whale hunt. Her body froze as she realized that what Black Wolf told her was true. Kia wanted to be his mate and no doubt had probably allowed him to take pleasure from her. She was refusing Fox because she thought that Fox would send her back to her parents if she found her to be tried.

“I will not send you back, Kia. I will not.” And with that, Fox closed her eyes and lowered her head. With her shorter, more powerful legs, she parted Kia’s thighs and began to move against her. Kia flinched when she felt the wetness on her thigh but other than that, she made no move to stop what was happening. As her mother had told her, she lay as still as she could and hoped it would end soon.

A groan escaped Fox’s throat as she moved herself over Kia’s long limbs. Remembering what she had been taught that one embarrassing season when she had first admitted her feelings about Kia to her grandmother, she slowed her movements and began to rub Kia’s breast. Kia jumped beneath her so Fox continued in her ministration. She swallowed hotly before closing her mouth over Kia’s breast. Kia started to struggle weakly but Fox held on to her, clamping her strong legs around her and continuing to suckle. She easily moved her hand down Kia’s body until she reached the triangle of womanhood that she had only seen when Kia thought she was asleep. All time seemed to stop when Fox’s hand covered the dark triangle of sex and her fingertips sank into the moisture that she found there like a warm spring. A moan erupted from Fox’s throat, startling Kia with its primitiveness.

Kia squeezed her eyes shut and held herself as stiffly as possible.

“Please, Kia?” Fox whispered brokenly. She wanted Kia to give in to her, to accept what she was offering, to not make her feel as if she was taking from her.

Her movements were becoming jerky against the tall lean body and even though Kia was becoming more and more aroused, she still had not moved and would not look at Fox. She didn’t know what was expected of her, so she lay there feeling a rush of emotion that she could not describe.

“You must not take your pleasure before she has hers, for that will be selfish and she will think you do not love her.” Fox heard her grandmother’s reminder and slowed her movements almost instantly.

Kia bit her lip and held her breath. She wondered if it was over. Fox’s movements were slowing. Kia felt the first twitch of a cramp in her leg from lying so still. She tried to ignore it but it continued to creep up on her like a determined badger. Her leg jumped and inadvertently in shifting positions, she pressed more firmly into Fox who was still moving slowly atop her.

“Oh…no,” Fox moaned in Kia’s ear and immediately began to shake. Kia didn’t know whether to move from her or to lie still as she had been told.

“Kia!” Fox groaned as she pressed into the softness beneath her and points of lights burst from behind her eyelids as warmth suffused her neither regions. She felt her body constrict against Kia, each constriction seeming to be more pleasurable than the last.

Fox raised her head to look at Kia, her disappointment so great that she felt like weeping; something she had not done since her grandmother’s death. Kia finally turned and looked up at the woman lying on top of her and saw only regret and sorrow. So she closed her heart and mind to Fox and turned her head away, effectively…unknowingly, hurting her more than a barbed whale spear ever could.

Fox struggled from the sleeping platform and to her feet. Closing the coat around her body, she stared down at the woman who was her mate and felt anger, this time at her own inadequacies.

“I will not touch you again,” she swore angrily. Walking over to the fire, she dipped two pieces of cloth into the warm water. With her back to Kia, she cleaned herself, almost weeping from the occasional constriction that her body had almost as if to let her know that she would not be allowed to forget the pleasure.

She walked over to Kia who had covered herself with a fur but still lay with her head turned away from Fox. Fox dropped the wet cloth on her chest causing her to look up with watery startled eyes.

“Wash yourself,” she ordered before walking to the other side of the room and, with her back to Kia, she lay down and pretended to fall asleep. She didn’t have the energy to remove the coat. So sure was she that she had no chance of winning Kia’s love that all she wished to do was close her eyes and sleep in the hopes that the dreadful loneliness that she felt from her actions would fade.

Kia lay stunned for a moment before picking up the cloth and cleaning herself as she had been ordered. In the flickering light, she could barely see the coat that Fox still wore.

Fox buried her nose in the coat that she wore, breathing in deeply and grimacing from the painful pleasure that coursed through her as Kia’s scent caressed her nostrils and left her senses reeling. Oh, grandmother, she will not have me, she will not have me…were her final thoughts before falling into a dejected half sleep.

Kia allowed large tears to slip down her cheeks as she cleaned the evidence of Fox’s need from her body. She had tried to be as still as she could and she thought that Fox was enjoying herself but from Fox’s reaction, she now thought that she had been wrong. She curled into herself and stared blindly at the wall. She had no doubt in her mind that Fox would send her back to winter camp tomorrow for not giving her pleasure. Kia cried herself to sleep. Her dreams were filled with thoughts of Fox being pleasured by some other woman of The People while Kia looked on powerless to stop it.

* * *

For several days Fox and Kia spoke to each other only when necessary. Fox was hurting and she didn’t know what to do about it and Kia was just plain confused and scared. Even as she tried not to think about it, her mind kept going over the night that Fox had come to her. Fox had not hurt her, in fact she had tried to make her comfortable, but Kia had been so frightened she didn’t know what to do. On the one hand, Kia was afraid of Fox, and on the other, she was afraid that Fox would send her home in disgrace.

The days steadily got shorter. Kia noticed that Fox would increasingly come home and fall exhausted into her bed furs, occasionally not even bothering to greet Kia. She was usually gone before Kia even awoke. On days like that, Kia felt the utter loneliness and desolation of living outside of winter camp as if it were a dagger in her heart. She had no one to talk to and no one to share with. Just a mate who had to struggle to say two words to her.

Fox was hurting as much as Kia, if not more. She wanted to apologize for insisting that Kia join with her but yet the thought of being with her again was never far from her thoughts. Every time she looked at her, she felt the need to be closer to her, to touch her in some way. The only thing keeping her from doing so was the promise she had made in the heat of anger and shame.

As the days grew to a close however, Fox began to fear that Kia would leave her. It was little things at first. Kia would watch her when she thought Fox wasn’t looking. She would jump when Fox would come too near. She would still hide herself when she removed her clothing to bathe. And she would murmur in her sleep. Fox was sure that she was having nightmares about her because she would call out her name. It was these things that caused Fox to let go of her anger in the hopes that she could keep Kia with her. The idea of Kia leaving made Fox feel as if she would never be warm again.

Fox drew her knife over the inside of the pelt and then cut the feet off of the rabbit and threw them to the dogs. Her mind was not on what she was doing but it posed no danger to Fox. She could hunt and skin a rabbit in a whiteout if she had to. Her thoughts were only of Kia. She wanted so much to be with her, how had she gone so wrong? She had seen how loving Kia could be with friends and family, why was Kia so unwilling to give her a chance? Black Wolf’s words hovered ominously over Fox as they had every day since he had said them. Once again Fox felt anger well up in her as she thought of Kia, her mate, lying with Black Wolf, giving him the pleasure that she refused to give to her. Fox suddenly felt numb she looked up at the desolate gray skies and at her surprisingly quiet dogs and fought hard against the urge to cry. In her head, she repeated a question that no one but Kia could give the answer to. Why can’t she love me?

To the conclusion